Three be the things I shall never attain: Envy, content, and sufficient champagne." -Dorothy Parker From pubs, alehouses, wine bars, vineyards, across the table, and under the table comes a flowing river of thoughts about drinking. Some of it you'll find profound, some of it funny, some of it silly. But all of it's about that most inspired of human inventions: alcohol. From the ancient ("The man who isn't jolly after drinking is just a driveling idiot to my thinking." -Euripedes) to the modern ("Alcohol-the cause of and the solution to all of life's problems." -Homer Simpson), here is wit, wisdom, and drunken ramblings about beer, wine, whiskey, gin, and every other alcoholic substance humans have happily used since the beginning of time to pickle their livers. Mixed with favorite drink recipes, short biographies of potable quotables, and information about favorite watering spots, this is a resource you will want to keep next to the bottle of Beefeaters and bitters.